Jonathan ES Lin
Life · Tech · Faith

Don't Peak Too Early

Feb 21, 2021

I wonder where has my energy gone. In recent years I've been dealing with a lack of motivation, confidence, or desire to do anything. Mild depression perhaps, but generally just a lack of energy and enthusiasm for life.

Here is my hypothesis. You really have only a few shots to throw everything in your being toward a cause or purpose. And the sad thing is, I've spent it all too soon in my younger years.

The years that don't even matter – school. I spent too much time chasing academic results and accolades.

Imagine, I went to National Junior College in Singapore (under ASEAN scholarship) and out-kiasued most of the Singaporeans there. I was Student Council Secretary (highest office a non-Singaporean can hold), ran in track and field (long distance), Gavel Club (Toastmasters for below 21), did science research at IMRE (somehow to my surprise won a Gold medal at Singapore Science and Engineer Fair), still had to study for A Levels, and spent most of my weekends at City Harvest Church in Singapore (because I was caught up by the false teachings of the church and was extremely gung-ho to serve).

I can tell you the reason why I can't stand Singapore anymore – I pushed myself to the ultimate limit like I have never pushed before and got seriously sick of the place and myself. End of the day it didn't even matter much.

After that, it just went downhill. I did not have energy to push like crazy like that anymore. Not in university, not in my early working years, not now. I was spent. I look at all the hustlers, movers, and shakers now and marvel at their boundless energy.

And so, my advice to many out there is to not peak so soon. You don't really know what is worth pursuing until later in life, like after 30 years old. So just chill out, fail some exams, play games, play sports, hang out with friends more, don't attend tuition classes, and stop doing stuff just to fill up your silly resume, of which most of the top university deans have seen far too many of the same and simply roll their eyes at yet another stereotypical teen with too many co-curricular activities.

Just be unique. Do unique stuff. Take it easy. Take it slow. Life is a marathon.