Life in M'sia · Christianity · Code

What If You Don't Get What You Want?

Jan 28, 2020

"What if you don't get what you want?", is a pertinent question for all persons, irregardless of the thing that is wanted.

The thing that is wanted may be a certain level of income, financial freedom, romantic love, stature and achievement, business success, entrepreneurial accomplishment, or even simply getting a job, trying to move to a different country, or trying to pick up a new skill. The list is endless.

But what if you don't manage to attain it, no matter how hard you try?

Let's ponder some of the possible responses to this question.

Positive Responses

  1. "I can reevaluate my goals"
  2. "I can do better next time"
  3. "Life is worth living with or without the thing I want"
  4. "I will try again with a different strategy"
  5. "I will take care of myself and preserve my relationships"
  6. "I am happy that others achieve the thing I want"
  7. "I am thankful for what I already have"
  8. "I am content in life"
  9. "I can still face people despite not getting the thing I want"
  10. "I will make the best of my situation and see it differently"
  11. "This is only a temporary setback"
  12. "I can be happy whether or not I get the thing I want"
  13. "It is not anyone's fault that I do not get the thing I want"
  14. "It is not God's fault that I do not get the thing I want"
  15. "My value as a human being does not depend on getting the thing I want"
  16. "My identity as a person does not depend on getting the thing I want"
  17. "I am calm and accepting of my situation"
  18. "I am still a nice person to talk to"

Negative Responses

  1. "I cannot change my goals"
  2. "I cannot do any better anymore"
  3. "Life is not worth living if I don't get the thing I want"
  4. "What's the point of trying, always the same result"
  5. "I will sacrifice my health and relationships to get what I want"
  6. "If I can't have it, neither can/should you"
  7. "Without the thing, life is meaningless"
  8. "I will only be content when I get the thing I want"
  9. "Without the thing, I have no face and am unwilling to face people"
  10. "My situation is hopeless and I cannot continue"
  11. "Nothing that I do can change this, I am stuck here forever"
  12. "I cannot be happy unless I get the thing I want"
  13. "I blame others for my failures"
  14. "I blame God for my shortcomings"
  15. "My value as a human being depends on getting the thing I want"
  16. "My identity as a person depends on getting the thing I want"
  17. "I am angry and unaccepting of my situation"
  18. "I am unsociable because of my situation"

Why am I writing this

Just thinking aloud. It is too easy to respond negatively when you do not get the thing that you want. This is an exercise for me to list out the positive responses. Hope it helps you to medidate on what you want, and how to respond when you cannot attain it (yet).